video? what video??

so i have been trying to do a video for Kim, at Texting my Pancreas 's wonderful YOU CAN DO THIS project.

apparently me and video do not get along.  i have tried 3 or 4 times to get it right, but to no avail.  this morning, i got all dolled up, even put on makeup, and lo and behold, my stupid camera does not want to cooperate!  the video is all slow, and wonky, and i look a little jaundiced!  LOL!! 

so i think i will see if i can get some assistance with this.  it appears that maybe the camera has diabetes.  it is not doing what i want it to do when i want it to do it!!   it may be a few days before i get it posted, but i will keep up the fight! 

p.s.  i have watched all the videos and read all the posts and you guys ROCK!!!!!

Diabetes sucks
The life out of my cheque book
I wish I were rich

i am tired of going to work, just to be able to buy my d-supplies.
or at least that is how it seems right now.
i am no longer covered under my husbands benifits at work.
it seems that they only allow $1000/yr/person, and i have maxed that out already.
the plan just started in October, so i have a few more months to survive, until my $1000
starts again.

luckily for me, here in Ontario, Canada, we have coverage for our pump supplies.
the Ontario government gives us $2400/yr benefit (doled out quarterly) for insulin pump supplies.  things like cartridges, infusion sets, whatever you need. 

all you have to do is keep the receipts in case they want to verify what you used the money for.  i don't have a problem with that.

right now, my only problem is that Canada Post is under lock out.  they went on strike.  it was a rolling strike.  delivery every other day.  then the government locked them out. 

so the cheque i am waiting for, is locked up.  supposedly they are being forced back to work tomorrow.  i should get my cheque in a couple days.  good thing, 'cause my bank account needs it!

i still have to figure out where the $$$$ is coming from to pay for the other drugs such as insulin,  blood pressure meds, high cholesterol meds, thyroid meds, test strips.....oh i know there are people worse off than me.

i just wish, for everyone's sake, that the drug companies would understand that we don't take these things 'cause we want to.  and we really do want to live long, healthy lives.  why do they make it sooo difficult?

vlogging

today i am gathering my thoughts.  i have decided to participate in Kim over at Texting my Pancreas' YOU CAN DO THIS project .

i have had lots of ideas, but getting them all sorted out has taken  some time.  also, being new at this whole blogging thing, and never having made a video, it seems a little daunting.

i will get it together, and hopefully, between looking after the grandkids all day, and working in the evenings, i will get some "me" time to put it together!

wish me luck!

to worry or not to worry

yesterday i had my quarterly appt with my endo.  what is it about going there that sends me a little crazy?

is it my A1c?
is it my blood pressure?
perhaps it's my cholesterol levels.
or maybe it's the amount of protein in my urine.

all of these things worry me.  my doctor always gives me a copy of the results of my recent blood work.  i don't really understand it all. i mean, it's about as clear as mud.

i will say, that my A1c is coming down nicely.   i'm quite happy about that.  a year or so ago, it was somewhere close to 10.  each time i go for bloodwork it comes down.  this time it was 7.2.  i was ecstatic!

cholesterol is a little high.  blood pressure is a little high.  i do believe, however, that i suffer from white coat syndrome.  it seems that my blood pressure is always a little higher than my normal when i am at the doctors. 

this time, dear doctor asked me if i had ever seen a kidney specialist.  it seems that the protein in my urine could be something to worry about.  i have never seen a specialist regarding my kidneys.  he said not to worry.  he wanted to do another test in a months time.  a first morning pee.  he said it could just be a one off and again told me not to worry.

uh huh.  don't worry.  does he realize that is exactly what i have been doing since he told me that yesterday morning! 

and does he realize that worry is stress and stress is not good!  i am supposed to try not to stress.  it's not good for my newly bypassed arteries. 

obviously he is getting to know me better, because he doubled my dose of Avapro (blood pressure med).

now if only i could turn my brain off.      8-/

miracles can and do happen

meet my granddaughter.  she is almost 16 months old.  this is how she fell asleep this morning while sitting on my lap. 
as i sat there watching her sleep, a millions thoughts entered my head. 

here are just a few of them

~this is one of the reasons i get up every morning
~this is one of the reasons i am working very hard to keep everything in check
~this is one of the reasons i feel blessed
~this is one of the reasons i am glad i didn't listen to the doctors
~this is one of the reasons i try not to get depressed
~this is one of the reasons i'm glad i listened to my doctor

there are times, as you all know, when some days are just too much.  you don't have the energy to get out of bed.  when you wish D and everything that goes along with it would just piss off.
just before Christmas of last year, i found out that the pains i had had for about 7 months were not indigestion.  they were angina, and i was about to have my life turned upside down.
january 6th i had an angiogram done, and that showed several blocked arteries.  basically they told us that i was a heart attack waiting to happen.  scary thought.  i was not worried about my husband or my kids.  they are adults, they can deal with things.  i was, however, worried about my 2 grandchildren.  they were 5 and not quite 1, and  didn't want them to have to grow up without their Nan.  so on january 10 i underwent triple bypass surgery.  it wasn't easy, and i realized shortly after how blessed i am.  my family was with me every day.  my youngest daughter came home from college for Christmas and decided to take the remainder of the year off to be home to help me.  my husband did the grocery shopping every week for the first time in 28 years.  (i did write lists, and he did call occasionally from the store for clarification).  my oldest daughter cooked meals, and drove me to all my appointments.  my son bought me books to keep me occupied and visited often.  and my grandkids made me smile.  they gave me the push i needed to really step up and take ownership of my diabetes and my heart.  i love them dearly and i cherish every day that i wake up and get to watch them grow, and learn.  i babysit for my daughter and i love the fact that i get to play with them everyday.
they gave me the strength to start using a pump after 36years with diabetes.  they save me everyday.

my miracle <3

2 more sleeps!

only 2 more sleeps and then i am going on my mini vacation.  a 3night, 4day trip to the cottage that myself and my girlfriends have been renting for the past, oh 5 years i guess. 
this year will  be a little different.  reason being?  i am now using my Animas Ping Pump!!  so i guess instead of just packing insulin (2types), pens, tips, meter, and strips, and a couple of pills,  i will be packing a little more.

and so i have decided that i will be in need of something lovely to carry all my supplies in.  something that will hold ~~~ are you ready?  

insulin (again 2types just in case, as well as pens & tips, again just in case!), meter, stips, cartridges, infusion sets, glucagon, and glucose tabs!  plus my list of pills which include, thyroid, blood pressure, cholesterol and iron pills,  as well as baby aspirin.

any ideas??   any suggestions are welcome, and appreciated!!

work, work, and more work

hey everyone! 
i am soooo tired!  i have been back to work for almost a month now.  i work 5 4hr shifts a week.  after being off for 5 months, it feels good to be back.  8-)   but i am sooooo tired!   this week i am working every night 'til 10pm.  one good thing is i don't have to pick my youngest daughter up from her job at midnight!  her shift changed and she is working days for the next 2 weeks.  thank goodness!
i am going away this coming weekend.  every year, myself, and 6 friends (one of which is my middle child), rent a cottage and go away for a weekend of food, fun, sun and relaxing.  (oh and a few drinks perhaps :) ) 
i am looking forward to this maybe more than any other year.  i will be surrounded by people that care about me, and look out for me, but don't make me feel different.  they all know about my diabetes, but they don't make a big deal out if it.  i really appreciate this.  they all know i had triple bypass surgery in january, but they don't make a big deal out of that either.  i know they keep there eyes open but
nobody says "are you sure you should eat that" or "did you check your blood?"  they just let me be me.
my daughter is not my daughter when we're away.  she is just one of the girls.  i love her to death! 
i am praying for good weather, but even if it rains, we have a lovely fireplace, and a whole lot of movies to watch.  we will play Rummoli, and listen to some music.  the list of food is endless and we always come home feeling like we've gained about 10 lbs!!
i cant wait til friday.  i will post some pics when i get back.

i believe i can fly!

so i have decided that i am going to fly.  yep, thats right.  i am going to spread my wings, and fly!
as you may have heard, kim, at Texting My Pancreas, had a fabulous idea, that flies June 15.  the youcandothis project.  and so i have decided to fly with this.  new to blogging and never having made a video, i am going to join this project.  not being very techie, it may take me a day or two to figure it all out and get it posted, but i am definately going to give it a tryfly!!  i think it is a great idea, and it will be a great tool for all types of diabetics, new and old, T1, T2, Lada's, whomever.  i am really looking forward to watching them all!!!  so come on, you can do this!!!